Woman, Ladies, Girls, Females...

WOW time just flies by - but i am blogging (finally)
Today is Woman's Day in SA.

Us ladies all have a say in this world today! Why sit around when our opinion matters. Who cares what anyone thinks, get up and stand for who you are and what you're worth.

For me as a young lady i see everyone as equal! No matter what colour, size, or sex...we are ALL EVEN.
Today i was sitting in church and we sang:
Shout To The North
Men of faith rise up and sing
Of the great and glorious King
You are strong when you feel weak
In your brokeness complete

Shout to the North and the South
Sing to the East and the West
Jesus is saviour to all
Lord of heaven and earth

Rise up women of the truth
Stand and sing to broken hearts
Who can know the healing power
Of our awesome King of love

We've been through fire we've been through rain
We've been refined by the power of his name
We've fallen deeper in love with you
You've burned the truth on our lips

Rise up church with broken wings
Fill this place with songs again
Of our God who reigns on high
By His grace again we'll fly

I then realised that we can't sit on our butts and wait for our dreams to come true - we have to work to make our dreams come true! If we want something, we have to fight for it.
Yes i may have big dreams and a big heart for poor children with nothing but i have to keep working towards those dreams, and if i don't accomplish them, then i can't say i didn't try.

I want to help the community, i want to get involved and mix with other people and share the love i have in my heart with children! Imagine what a better place the world would be if we all just put in a little effort to help others!

No one said life would be easy! But we all can make our lives happy by being positive and not stressing about every little thing! A positive attitude goes a LONG way! Take a step out in faith and put yourself out there to help others... Go on fight for what you want!

GO get your dreams..they are waiting!
God doesn't just hand out everything without trust, faith, love, and a bit of work!
I don't want to go to my grave one day knowing i did nothing to achieve my goals/dreams! And the work starts TODAY because we never know what may happen tomorrow!

It is going to be a GOOD week :-)

Who am I???

Who am I? it is a scary question when it actually hits you... Think about it, who are you?
We spend our lives trying not to be someone others want us to be, but in fact in trying not to be we actually are being someone we are not.

I am faced with this question as life takes a different turn into the next semester.
So many things to think about...

• I am a Christian girl - BUT am I?? I go to church often, i read a lesson at church once a month, i care for others, i try as best i can to help others, i don't do drugs and i don't mix with people that do.. So am I a Christian? I don't pray everyday, i don't have a quiet time. So that is apart of ME who i don't know about and have no answers.
• I have fallen inlove with someone that lives 9 513km away... How can that work...It can't. No one else seems to matter anymore. It is the strangest feeling. I think about him often.
• I love animals. I have a cat called Pepsi and i totally adore her. I have a dog called Jackie and she is my child. Without them i wouldn't be able to function.
• I have a passion for children. I am curently studying teaching and am loving it. Kids make me feel happy.
• Music is one of my favourite things, music can cure anything!
• I don't like wearing fancy or very fashionable clothes, i like tshirts and flip flops...But that doesn't mean i don't like dressing up when the time is right. I don't like make-up, I only wear mascara and sometimes base.
• I would love to live on a farm and wear wellies
• i like to be organised but plans can be flexible.
• family means the world to me.
• i have a desire to travel and see the world....But money let's me down.
• i am a sensitive person and words can heart me deeply
• i am good at hiding pan and hurt
• i enjoy mountain biking when i am fit
• i love swimming
• i have a condition called Poly-cystic ovary syndrome
• soft hearted...yip that's me..
• i love anything to do with biology - brains, hearts etc
• i would love to be a nurse
• yes i have a drink and am not ashamed of it BUT i do not abuse alcohol

I guess this sums up ME - a girl who is a luke warm Christian, who loves a man who is miles away, who has a passion for kids but also loves nursing, who can't fullfill desires. But i am a casual person.

Maybe i am ME but maybe i'm trying too hard to find ME, i don't know.

No one said life would be easy.

"Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"

To a Very special sister.....

Today 4th June 2009 is my sister Paula's Birthday!

She turns 14 today. This time 14 years ago i had a little new sister. Although we fight like all siblings do, she is very special to me!

This post will be all about Paula and i will add photos as i go along......

My sister is a beautiful girl, with long golden hair. She has brown eyes just like me. Paula and i are totally opposite - she likes reading, i don't, she doesn't procrastinate, i am the queen, she is academic, i HATE academics, she is good at hockey, I'm good at other sport.

I know sometimes i don't show Paula alot of love, BUT deep down i truly adore her, how can you not - she is my one and only sister who often makes me laugh and she loves me back.I am SO proud of her - at every opportunity i brag about her. Paula was i Gr 7 last year, at the same school i TA at, and she was the Leopard house captain and that just made me so incredibly proud. When she walked in with her team behind her at the swimming gala i got tears in my eyes! For me that was a huge thing, it was amazing!!! I will ALWAYS be proud of her no matter what. And very protective over her!! She is my "baby" sister!!

Paula is gonna go far in life, she has a heart full of gold. Her heart is purely made of compassion, love, sencerity, and joy. Paula has a personality of her own. She is unique in every way. Hahaha in more ways than others. When Paula is sick, the WHOLE house wakes up (her nick name is Cotchy Paula) ;-) I have never heard anyone cough the way Paula does. She has unigue characteristics that make her the girl and sister she is!!!



Paula has a faith that i have never seen in a 14 year old! She hates racisms and raises her opinions! She believes we are all equal and she portrays that in all she does!
I have such good memories of Paula and I back in our childhood. We played games like teacher teacher, we climbed trees together, we played in the sandpit together, we rode scooters together, we chased chickens together but most of all we loved each other!

I really thought that this post would be easy to write, but in fact it isn't!! Everytime i think of something tears come to my eyes!! I don't know what i'd do if i lost my sister! I want her to know i truly adore her and love her with all my heart! Paula is always there for me and i truly apprecaite it!

Here is a little poem i found and it is dedicated to my best friend - my sister! It sums up exactly how i feel.

I'll always be here through thick and thin
You can come to me, I'll listenI'm your friend, I won't push you away
When you need a hug, my arms are wide open
When you need to talk, I have an open ear
Your growing up and getting older
Know that I'm always here, I'm not going anywhere
Wherever you are, I'm there with you
You’re in my heart and my prayers
Just know I'm here, because I truly care
You’re my sister, you mean so much
Don't want to see you hurt or cry
I'll wipe the tears, I'll get rid of your fears
Want to see you grow up and achieve
Just believe, have faith
You can do anything
You’re beautiful inside and out
You’re smart and very talented
You’re many things, but most all, you’re my sister
I believe in you and know that I'll never stop loving you
Rachel S. Lengefeld



My sister and i love teasing each other! There is alwasy room for jokes in our family!

To end off i want to tell my sister I love her!! Paula i love you with all my heart, and you are the best sister ever!! You are a beautiful girl with loads of potential. You are very special and never forget that!

Last but not least i wanna end off with the BEST picture i have of Paula, it is my favourite and it is too gorgeous i just love it!!!

Hahaha Love you Lals :-)

P.s 2 really cute pics of Paula!!
A very happy birthday to you!!

aha

Sport is a wonderful thing...

I love sport.... Well i only love it when i'm fit! I don't really wanna get into it when i am unfit!
For some reason though, when i actually do a sport i thoroughly enjoy it and then wonder why i don't do it more often, and the answer is UNFITNESS!
Sport is a great way of unwinding, socializing, losing unwanted fat, and for making new friends! Sport unites people, it creates an atmosphere, it produces emotions, it changes life!
It encourages spirit in the form of people shouting for others and getting the adrenalin pumping.

I love getting involved and supporting a team, it just makes me feel great!
Now on Saturday it is the Super 14 final - Blue Bulls vs Chiefs, BUT i will be "supporting" the Blou Bulle in my sharks shirt, i have to support a SA team but my spirit won't be very high because the Sharks (the best team) aren't playing. Now this is what sport is about - fans/supporters coming together and supporting their team. Sport also brings out the worst in us - i can't help but get angry and frustrated! I feel SO sad and irritated when the Sharks or Springboks lose! It isn't good for the heart!

I am a big rugby and cricket fan! I love watching sport.
As far as me doing sport, i MTB, swim and am getting into running. I would love to play action cricket!

SO come on everyone get off your bums and support a team, any team...it may be soccer, hockey, rugby or cricket! Lets get the comraderie going!!

Today, Now, Me.....

Why do people complain? Some people complain more than others....Why?? These questions go through my head often! We have so much to be happy for, we are so blessed! Families - yes, food - yes, bedding and housing - yes, clothes - yes, pets who love us - yes.....And yet we still complain! People out there are dying.... and we still complain about the small things! Yes i know we don't have to feel guilty the whole time but some people complain about the petty things.

My life has taken a happy turn - i've got a new outlook on life, we don't have forever to live on earth and time is running out - so why waste time being sad and down, be happy and make each day worth it, live it to the full and get something out of it! Each day provides opportunities to learn, to love, to laugh and yes even to make mistakes. You can't say i have a dream and do nothing towards it, each day you have to work towards that dream.

No one said life was gonna be easy, but we make it complicated. I am happy where i am, i love children and i am working as a Teacher's Assistant (I love my job) i have a family who loves me.....so what more could i want?!
I've decided that each day we have a choice whether we want it to be a good day or a bad day...we have a choice to go out there and make it a good day no matter what, people push us down, stand up and learn something from it! I've had times at work where i wish i could leave because of issues, but i've learnt you can't run away from problems, you have to face them!

I know it may all sound so easy and there are times that are tough but we gotta keep our heads up no matter what.
I want to smile and laugh and be happy, and know that if i die today - i died a happy person and i tried my best at life!

We can't sit back and relax, we got to work for what we want! Nothing comes for free.

Never have regrets because from every bad choice or mistake you learn something!

So take that step of faith and take life by the horns.....

:-)

"Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"

Reasons Why I love my Mom...

1) She loves me no matter what.
2) She spends time with me.
3) She helps me through tough times.
4) She comforts me
5) She protects me
6) She taught me how to drive
7) She has taught me life lessons
8) She has always stuck by me
9) She has given me my freedom
10) She always wants what is best for me.
11) She loves me for who i am
12) most of all she has given me a home (yes with my dad BUT this post is about mom!)

I love my mom SO SO much! I would really be lost without her. My Nana (my mom's mom) passed away in November and i will never really know how my mom felt, but if i had to lose my mom - i really don't know how i will cope! She is a HUGE part of who i am.
I love spending time with my mom. We make each other laugh, we going shopping together, we go put petrol in together....we do alot together and i absolutely love it.

A mom is something special and a mom can never be replaced.
We all have days when we dislike our mom's and wish they would get out our lives BUT in reality it is all false.

Mom's do alot for us that goes unoticed! I really appreciate my mom and for all she does for me.
My mom is my best friend! There is nothing she doesn't know!

So to my mom.... I love you and i will always love you!!

My New Kitten...

I have got a new little Kitten. Her name is Pepsi!

Her story is interesting.... I saved her life.

She was running around in the middle of the road one Sunday afternoon and nearly got hit by a taxi. She is black with greeny yellow eyes!

She is just too precious and has crept into my heart. I could not take her to the SPCA after i saved her. She is full of beans. BUT i love her.

My favourite song...

Use Somebody - Kings Of Leon

I've been roaming around
Always looking down at all I see
Painted faces, fill the places I cant reach

You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody

Someone like you, And all you know, And how you speak
Countless lovers under cover of the street

You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
Someone like you

Off in the night, while you live it up, I'm off to sleep
Waging wars to shape the poet and the beat
I hope it's gonna make you notice
I hope it's gonna make you notice

Someone like me
Someone like me
Someone like me, somebody

Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody

I've been roaming around,
Always looking down at all I see

What a week..

This week has been such a busy week!
Studying has been busy this week and so has work!! But i have totally fallen inlove with my little Grade ones! They are just too cute.

The one sad thing this week was my Grade 7 teacher had her last day on Friday!! I cried 3 times on friday! You see Izotsha was my favourite school - i started there in 2001 and i was in Gr 6. BUT the best year of my life was in Gr 7. I was in Mrs M's class and her and i just clicked from day one! She taught me so many important lessons - she bulit my confidence! She was my sencond mother! Izotsha became a 2nd home for me...i LOVED it there! Anyway the day i left i cried for hours afterwards...my heart was never whole after that! I hated high school and wished everyday that i could go back to Izotsha.

After matric i got a TA (teacher's assistant) post there and here i am back at Izotsha! I am going into my 2nd year there and i am loving it! But with Mrs M leaving on friday i feel like the part of Izotsha that meant so much to me is leaving! The school has changed so much since i was there and now i feel like that part of me is leaving again!! So Friday was a very sad day for me!!

I am glad it is weekend and am able to rest!
Have a good weekend everyone!

:-)

The outcome

Thanks Kitty Cat and Being Brazen for the comments on my previous post!!

I have taken the advice and R and I are together!! We'll give it a bash and see how things go!

We will be seeing each other again for Valentines weekend where we will probably go to the Watershed concert at the Botanical gardens!! So i am counting the days......

Things are going well so far - although this weekend he is out of comms (i am finding it very hard :-( )

Anyway i hope everyone is doing well and is having a good weekend so far!!??

bye for now
:-)

Mixed feelings.....a torn heart....

School broke up on the 5th December 2008 - it was a day with loads of different emotions! 1) sadness - it was my sister's last day of primary school and that was a shock for me beacuse i can clearly remember my last day there!! 2) excitement - it was the start of the 6week holidays! 3) nervousness - my friend was coming down in a couple of hours and he was bringing a friend and i was feeling a tad nervous BUT excited as well!!

Anyway, i got home at 11:15am and M and R arrived at 12ish! M didn't even introduce me to R but we unpacked their car nevertheless! As we unpacked we all were laughing and M was teasing me! Things were going great! I stayed there (they stayed at my grandpa's house) for the rest of the day! We were getting on so well despite the fact that R and I were never officially introduced! we spent 3 hours the one day just chatting - from total strangers to sharing everything about each other! To cut the story short R and I connected so well! It was scary how well you could get on with someone after you had just met them! We really did get on well!

11 days passed by so quickly and we all departed and went our separate ways. R and i promised to keep in contact, which we did! On Christmas eve R told me that he really liked me BUT was scared I'd diss him beacuse he is 2 years younger than me, anyway things got more interesting, we spoke until after midnight about our dillema! (oh i forgot to mention he lives in Greytown which is outside Pietermaritzburg - 3 hours away from me)

On Christmas day we chatted a bit but nothing really happened! I then went up to him on Tues 30th December and i spent the night there before we went to Midmar for New Year! Things were going well, we were getting on well! Then on New Years eve we were kind of together, he kissed me for the first time and we took many walks hand in hand! On new years day he came home with me and on the 2nd we went to the Transkei with my friend and her boyfriend and my friend's parents. Things were really going well and he officially asked me out while we were there! When we got back for 7 days in the transkei he stayed here for another 2 days! And on the last night we were having 2nd thoughts because of the distance! and he is going off to Stellenbosch for Varsity next year and that's like 16 hours away! Anyway we decided to keep things as friends and we'll wait and see what happens! He is coming down here in April for the holidays and we are gonna see then about what to do...do we pursue a relationship or do we just say best friends!!???

Now my heart doesn't know what to do - i really like him, we get on well and i have been single for so long and it might be nice to have someone to unload on and who is affectionate to you! But on the other hand i am scared to commit because of the distance thing!! I really don't know what to do!!

Please any advice???????

2009

My very first post for 2009!

Today is a Saturday! It started off with gym and then a Mugg and Bean breakfast!
I hope that everyone had a blessed festive season??

May the New Year bring many laughs, loads of happiness and love to everyone.

:-)