Sunday, July 26, 2009

Who am I???

Who am I? it is a scary question when it actually hits you... Think about it, who are you?
We spend our lives trying not to be someone others want us to be, but in fact in trying not to be we actually are being someone we are not.

I am faced with this question as life takes a different turn into the next semester.
So many things to think about...

  • I am a Christian girl - BUT am I?? I go to church often, i read a lesson at church once a month, i care for others, i try as best i can to help others, i don't do drugs and i don't mix with people that do.. So am I a Christian? I don't pray everyday, i don't have a quiet time. So that is apart of ME who i don't know about and have no answers.
  • I have fallen inlove with someone that lives 9 513km away... How can that work...It can't. No one else seems to matter anymore. It is the strangest feeling. I think about him often.
  • I love animals. I have a cat called Pepsi and i totally adore her. I have a dog called Jackie and she is my child. Without them i wouldn't be able to function.
  • I have a passion for children. I am curently studying teaching and am loving it. Kids make me feel happy.
  • Music is one of my favourite things, music can cure anything!
  • I don't like wearing fancy or very fashionable clothes, i like tshirts and flip flops...But that doesn't mean i don't like dressing up when the time is right. I don't like make-up, I only wear mascara and sometimes base.
  • I would love to live on a farm and wear wellies
  • i like to be organised but plans can be flexible.
  • family means the world to me.
  • i have a desire to travel and see the world....But money let's me down.
  • i am a sensitive person and words can heart me deeply
  • i am good at hiding pan and hurt
  • i enjoy mountain biking when i am fit
  • i love swimming
  • i have a condition called Poly-cystic ovary syndrome
  • soft hearted...yip that's me..
  • i love anything to do with biology - brains, hearts etc
  • i would love to be a nurse
  • yes i have a drink and am not ashamed of it BUT i do not abuse alcohol

I guess this sums up ME - a girl who is a luke warm Christian, who loves a man who is miles away, who has a passion for kids but also loves nursing, who can't fullfill desires. But i am a casual person.

Maybe i am ME but maybe i'm trying too hard to find ME, i don't know.

No one said life would be easy.

"Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"

1 comment:

Gill said...

Wow, Rox, tough post. Lots of food for though here.

Want to know who I think you are?

I think you are beautiful, inside and out - but I don't think you always believe that.

I think you are incredibly brave, even though you often feel vulnerable

I think you are bubbly and vibrant, although I know that right now you feel sad and down

I think you are someone who is incredibly unlucky in love, but that doesn't mean it will always be that way

I think that oneday you will find someone who really appreciates the beautiful, special girl you are, but until then - please don't settle for second best.

I think you have so many layers to your character and sometimes that makes you feel confused

I think I am the luckiest mom in the world to have you in my life

I think you are my daughter, my confidant and my very best friend all rolled into one